Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Randon Rant

It's so easy to get down in the dumps, or have a pity party for yourself...
I have to keep in mind God is in Control- no matter what!  He doesn't bring you into the wilderness to leave you!  He's Just, Mighty, and Merciful, and although we may not know or understand all we go through; He will bring us through it!   I have to remember that no thing I go through is everlasting and if it doesn't kill me, it will indeed make me stronger!  I can not allow minor setbacks to deter me from joy that I should keep within.  There is someone battling something far greater.  There is someone laying in a hospital bed begging and pleading for their life!  There is someone without shelter or food to sustain them through each day! There is someone praying that their next move is the BEST move...
The Storm has to pass!  It can't last!  The sun will shine again!

Thursday, November 25, 2010

What's in a Name?

I just want to know why parents are naming these kids any old thing?  These names aren't phonetically correct or spelled correctly and these poor kids have to go through life explaining how to pronounce their names or giving themselves alternate names just to function in society.  Now, I'm not the name compass of whats right or wrong with folks' names, however; I'm here to tell you:  Stop doing it please!!  I beg of you!  These parents are trying to be creative and unique and are causing kids a lifetime of pain and anguish, not to mention ridicule!
I never noticed this either, until I began working in the public education school system.  I mean, okay...I knew there were these odd-ball names out here...I mean I grew up in the era of the Shameka's, Tameka's, Dameka, MeMeka, Shateka's!  But come on, it's gotten worse.  And the funniest part is that for whatever strange reason, the ding dang on kids have the nerve to get an attitude when you don't get there name right the first time!  Are you serious?!?!  Like, for real, you about to go through life mad at the world for the rest of your life!!  Get REAL!  You may as well wear a name tag but I'm sorry...spelling your name Aerial and saying that you pronounce it Ireland is ludicris and retarded!!  Oh, and get over being called retarded!  No one cares that your feelings get hurt!  Saying retarded is not being insensitive to special needs!!  It's an expression and we can say it...it's America! Freedom of speech and you are RETARDED for spelling your childs name Aerial and expecting it to be pronounced Ireland!

**no one was hurt during the typing of this blog.  Aerial AND Ireland are fictional and any indication or similiarities to someone alive or dead is purely accidental**

OMG Tour

So...if you know me...you know I love Usher Raymond!  So much so, that I've dated a man that was spitting image to him LOL!  (not on purpose, I swear)
I've always known Usher to be a beast performer, but it had been close to 13 years since I last saw him in concert.  What can I say?  WE'VE grown together lol!
I waited to the last minute to get my tickets, which is normally highly unlikely of me, but for whatever reason...I just waited until the day before to get them.  Surprisingly, however, my seats were GREAT!  I got to the concert on time.  I didn't care to see Miguel (sorry new artist) but if I don't know your music, I'm not into you.  I'm sure someone is though. 
Trey Songz
My first impression of Trey Songz was grand.  I loved the countdown of 2 minutes until Mr. Steal Your Girl! Cute!  Now, I must say...many naysayers and lots of folks that have vocal abilities beyond my control have said admantly that Trey can NOT sing.  So, I counted down the 2 minutes expecting the worse.  He began with (my fav) panty dropper!  The bomb.  He would do falsetto's and if you've read my previous blogs, you know I'm a sucker for a grown man and a falsetto!  He also, I must say, has a great smile and boyish good looks...so that mos def hasn't hurt his review from me LOL!  He jammed.  He didn't have any glitz or glam and he only stayed on the stage for about 30-45 minutes...but I loved every minute of it.  He sang every song I personally love, so he was ALL GOOD!
The main attraction!  Of course they had to clear the stage...as soon as the lights went down and flurry of dancing men came onto the stage reminding me of an Alpha step routine!  Then came fireworks and a great boom!  Usher hit the stage.  Well actually hit the center of the toyota center and came from the ground to the sky (the bomb)  This man danced and sang his way through the air on a platform, lowered onto the stage, and kept dancing and flying through the air all as he sang!!
He then gave a tribute to the late, great Micheal Jackson (like no other could)  He dubbed himself Mr. Steal Your Wife and might I add...his dancers?!  Well let's just say...those women had me wanting to get my lil' self home, stretch and practice some new routines honey!  They were the bomb!  Oh, and Ms. Trenise...I am totally jealous of you on that stage during trading places...heffa!  Lol!  Just kidding! 
Just when you thought the show was over and he took position back into the air...it ain't over!  He began to pay homage to all his fans that have been ride or die for the past 18 years of his career, "this ain't a comeback," he says.  Then begins to play EVERYTHING you could imagine...all the great hits and number one collabos! He gave it to us and then some!  He ended with bad girl, confessions and of course....OMG!!So hats off to an awesome oh my gosh tour!  I loved it!

7 Habits of a Highly In-Effective CHEATER!

This list is not partial to men or to women.  It goes either way, for both genders.  It's simply a list I put together based on factual experiences, stories, tales and true life antics I've seen, heard and just down-right want to share!

7. They disappear for unexplainable time periods.
6. They can't or won't hold specific conversations with specific people in front of you.
5. They're defensive when you inquire about anything.
4. Habits change.
3. They get "new" found friends.
2. You find yourself in arguments and debates with them that have absolutely NO value.
**See below for explainations**

#7-Being sleep or losing your phone are the two most prized and overused excuses for the unexplainable time periods.  You might also be familiar wuth the infamous..."I was working late!" LOL!

#6-This one is tricky.  Maybe they don't feel like talking or maybe it's rude to speak about certain things at specific times.  Leave this particular one to your discretion.  There has to be A TIME when they CAN talk and you are around.  And when they do talk and it's more so listening than talking...radar UP please, that's a Highly Effective Habit of a CHEATER!  Short answer; yes and no, mmhhmm, uh-hu...does not make a conversation! 

#5- I mean, you can't even inquire about the weather and the idiot wants to chop your head off, as if you said something wrong!  This habit also falls under Sir Isaac Newton's 3rd law of thermodynamic energy (for my fellow science buffs) They will try and transfer energy.  Good or bad they will do it!  That just also means, if they're doing wrong; they'll try and make you feel guilty.  Switch-a-roo and such and such!  And you won't even realize it until you've gained 20 pounds or your savings account is at zero... LOL!

#4- Duh!  All of a sudden they love to go OUT and watch the game instead of stay in.  They love to shop for new lingerie peices!  They have "new" resturants, fragrances, meals and "tricks" up their sleeve they want to share with you or maybe not share...just tell you about it!

#3- Low and behold, there's this "new" friend they spend time with.  They have "new" things to talk about and "new" work to get done.  "New" interests and "new" information.  There ain't no such thang as "NEW".  Take it from me!

#2- Jokes, fun and games are a thing of the past; as you find yourself arguing, fussing and fighting over the smallest details.  A discussion about which resturant to go to turns into an all-out war and the next thing you know (surprise) you sitting at home eating a happy meal with no damn cheese, still hungry, but too mad to get more food...and where are they?! OUT!  (cuz y'all "upset" with each other)

#1- Please!  Let's stop pretending we don't already know when the relationship has gone down hill!  Or when a roving eye has changed the game!  You already know!  You didn't need me to put up the 7 Highly Effective Habits of a CHEATER.  It's already known by you!  Besides...the cheater is the only FOOL that truly believes they are getting away with something!  It always comes back to bite them in the arse (as my Uncles say!)

Love ya! 
Happy Loving somebody that loves you back!  There's HOPE!

Credits must be paid to the following:
Two Can Play That Game
I Think I Love My Wife
Martin Lawrence You So Crazy
He's Just Not That Into You
Family and Friends for your never-ending stories
Muah (myself) for my keen common sense that God gave me and my parents nurtured!

Fresh Fest!

Despite the misuse of a friendship from a particular person that will remain nameless...I had a great time at the Fresh Fest!!  I did arrive late and got to the concert just as Kid n' Play were hitting their famous dance duet!  So all was right with the world!  I think by far Naughty By Nature did the best as far as the show is concerned.  Treach has NOT changed.  That body is still right!! LOL!  A highlight for me was being able to communicate with them via twitter after the show!  I suppose twitter is a vast and resourceful tool for communicating through social networking!  Who would've thunk it?!  Vinny made the announcement to follow the group on twitter...I did...he responded...and then followed me back!  Cool! Salt n' Pepa, who I thought to be the headliner did alright!  Age has caught up with them.  The dance routines they did were sort of played and tired.  Sorry!  I love them don't get me worng...but with love comes honesty!  I tell ya' girls...next tour only rap!  Hire some choreographers and dancers to do the entertainment portion!  Heck!  Call me...I'm available!!!
The most interesting portion of the show was at the end when Salt had a come to Jesus meeting.  I'm all for prayer and supplication...trust me I am, however; it was ackward to say the least.  And her prayer of choice was to blast Kirk Franklin's Stomp as everyone was leaving the arena.  Mmmmmm, just something that makes you go...
I loved, loved, loved the interludes of old school music they played!  Brought back memories that I must say were bitter-sweet.  On one hand I reminised and thought back to happier times and on the other hand I reminised and thought back on happier times!  I almost cried right there in the arena in and around the midst of all those people.  It just seemed sad how life goes on...with or withOUT you, life goes on!  It made me want to cherish any and everybody I could think of.  I'm a softy like that!

P.S- Mad Hatta and Chilli Bill-Stay OFF the stage trying to get the crowd ready for the next act!!  We'd prefer music...please and thanks!

~These are My Confessions~

Listening to Usher's Confessions song made me want to write out mine...although they're not really deep, intoxicating or incrimminating confessions (trust and believe, no blog posts gets that good); it's just things specific to me (I also took some of it from a note I wrote from my facebook a little while back)  Here it goes~

1. I say totally inappropriate things just because I can and it's funny to me.
2. I'm a sucker for a grown man that can sing in falsetto. (mmmhhmm)
3. I don't like new people. 
4. At night I slather on vaseline and put on thick socks to keep my feet soft.
5. Up until about 6 months ago I didn't like oatmeal.  Now, because of starbucks, I'm addicted and go every morning to get the 'perfect oatmeal' for $2.65 (tax included)  Yesterday I went twice!
6. I'm asked about my nationality all the time, so because of this, I've considered practicing an accent or another language to begin the charade.
7. I dip french fries in vanilla milkshakes.
8. I randomly use movie phrases in conversations and only two of my close buddies every realise when I do it.
9. I DESPISE "girls night" events. Ironic that I'm in a sorority and a ladies club, huh?!
10. ...which leads right into my next confession of loving the company of males...boyfriends, male friends; give me a hard head over a chick anytime...er, no pun intended!
11. I used to want to be a stand-up comedian.
12. I get nervous around too many black folks.
13. I cut the rind off oranges and eat them like apples.
14. I'm a loner.
15. I'm a cry-baby...especially when I don't get my way!!
16. I can't stand when people are too touchy feely.  You don't have to touch me to speak to me.
17. In my car, you may hear the most angelic gospel lyrics ever...or you may hear the most raunchiest, down right nastiest lyrics ever. Only a certain few been with me when I'm playing dj! (don't judge me!)
18. People get on my nerves OFTEN being in my space or my business and I can't stand when a person tells you to smile.  I mean what major jerk-off is walking around smiling ALL day!
19. I've inquired about the precise cup size and measurements for breasts in the event I get up the nerve to be a playboy bunny!
20. I want to see a therapist.
21. I hold grudges.
22. I'm addicted to caffeine.
23. Blogging is my therapy.
24. I'm in love with a stipper.  JUST KIDDING!!
25. Don't let my dimples, pretty lil' face or sweet lil' demeanor fool ya'...I will do the fool or get to BLOWING up on your a$$ (as Kandi from RHOA said LOL-but for REAL)
I'll do a bonus to make it 25 since I played on one!
26. I'm sick and tired of people whose names begin with any letter but "K" name their kids with a name that begins with "K"!  Y'all taking all the good baby-names!!  Lol!

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!!  Enjoy Life!  Be Thankful!! No matter what your situation looks or feels like...Be THANKFUL!!

Khrystian Nichole

Saturday, November 13, 2010

Gift or a Curse?!

Intuition!  I'm seriously wondering; if it's a gift or a curse to know people, things and or situations in advance like I do!  I haven't figured it out yet.  Well, I haven't figured out if I love it or hate it.  It's like that expensive suede outfit that you got at one point in life that is now hanging in your closest and has been for the longest because you simply have no real need for it.  Waste of money, bad decision, or was it just purely premature thinking and one day very soon it'll come in handy and you'll wear it.  Because after all; it is fly!  Following me?
Sometimes I love the fact that I can read people's body language, actions and read between the lines to know what someone is "getting at" or what they possibly are trying to "get over"!  It surely keeps me on my toes and I'm always ready for their next move.  It also keeps me grounded and prepared for MY next move.  I just listen to a person talk and run all around doing them.  I let them feel like they're telling me something "new"  'cause let's face it- that's what they believe they're doing. LOL! However, I can never just BE!  I know things before they happen and more often than not, play it out in my head and have de'ja' vu when it finally does.  It's exhausting to look at someone that thinks they're bs'ing you and know right from the jump where the conversation's headed.  It's down-right insanity to have to listen to someone tip-toe and tap-dance all around a subject you know they should have spilled the beans about days before. 
Sometimes I find myself having an attitude with the person before they even get the chance to be or do the fool!  It's exhausting, I tell ya' and I mean it!
Knowing people.  Like the good book says, there's nothing new under the sun.  It's true.  I've been there and done that with so many people and situations...it's like, okay...on to the next one please and thank you.  They're boring me!  What's really hilarious is when the person that you KNOW you know, really and truly thinks they're different.  They can't tell that they're transparent and predictable.  They honestly believe they're doing something different, or have broken the mold on "getting over"  It's really pitiful, to say the least!  Sometimes I pray to the good Lord and say, "Father, get this idiot away from me." or "Lord, please in Jesus' name, remove this from around me."  But yet and still sometimes I'm privy to the situation and I find myself calling people out!  I have to.  These people BOTHER me!  Maybe it's just me...maybe no one else goes through this...but I tell you 9 times out of 10, I'm right on the money with my intuition, or I'll call it; my great and wonderous ability to see right through ya'!  You know who you are too if you are this type of individual...and most people recognize you....we just don't always have the energy to deal with ya'.  If you know me and you're this type of person...if I haven't dismissed you yet and I'm keeping you around...it's merely for entertainment! LOL!  Seriously though!  It makes my day brighter knowing your next move and playing on it like my very own stage play!  Besides, where else would I get my blog material!?!

Knock Off that Holiday Weight!

Brought to you by Crowd Pleasers Entertainment where; "Crowds watch us dance to see beauty and be Entertained; we DANCE to Please them!"  http://www.crowdpleasers.org/ Visit us on the web!

The holidays are fast approaching and with that said HEALTH, being our number one assest and liability, should be taken in to account!  The holiday time is feastive, fun and full of family, friends and plates of fabulous food...however; you can enjoy yourself and partake in all the yummy treats and eats without worrying about the dreaded New Year resolution of hitting the gym full force on January 1st!  Here are a few tips and quickies to help stay FIT and in your favorite jeans from November through January...that we really should practice all year! :-)

1. WALK briskly around the shopping centers.
          On "black Friday" and any other day your traveling through the malls or grocery stores; move       fast...breathe in and out.  Keep that heart beating fast with the excitement of the holidays!
2. Take the stairs instead of elevators.
          Very useful!  Keeps your legs toned and that butt tight!
3. Don't fall right to sleep after a meal.
          As tempting as it is-Don't do it!  Take that time to take the kids to the park, or a walk around the neigborhood, or dance!!  Nothing wrong with putting on a great cd or the radio and creating your very own soul train line.  Learn some new moves!  Crowd Pleasers Entertainment has a great line-dance cd ready for you to purchase for days of dancing fun!
4. Use everyday chores as a regiment!
          You'd be surprised as how much energy is used on everyday household chores!  Arm curl thoses and pot pans!  Sweep, mop or vacuum the floor with deep, elongated arm thrusts.  Wiping windows...wax and wan 10 times each!  It works!!
5. Drink plenty of water!
          Take bottles with you if you have to, but remember to drink them.  For every juice, soda or alcoholic beverage you drink...chase it down with the same volume of water!  Stay hydrated!
6. Balance and Moderation.
           You truly don't need 3 slices of cake, or that triple helping of dressing!  Eat and drink in moderation.  Don't eat to get full.  If you find yourself wanting mid-night snacks; instead of another slice of pie, get a serving of fruit salad or simply eat a peice of fruit!
7. Bundle up and enjoy the weather.
          Go outside and play kickball, shoot hoops, throw a ball around, hop-scotch.  Think back to your favorite holidays games and hop to it.  Get'er done!  You'll feel great and have a blast doing it!

Saturday, November 6, 2010

Customer Service is for S.H.I.T!!

I'm sorry customer service is doing the damn fool!!  What are these representatives learning during the "supposed" training?!  For as long as I've been a consumer (and that's been forever) the level of dedication towards customer service has diminished year by year!  We've moved away from-the customer is always right to; customer get the heck out of our store unless you're making an obsene purchase!  If you have a question about your product, service or merchandise, please consult someone who gives a damn!
We've lost customer appreciation and concern for clients that are spending their hard-earned, or not so hard at times, money in your establishment.  You barely get a hello when you walk in.  The worker...associate...barista...specialist, whatever "valuable" title they're giving themselves nowadays is so engrossed in their own conversation via cell phone, or employee to employee, or even relationship (boyfriends, husbands, wives, girlfriends) on the job!!  I'll give you some examples and I will be calling out these so-called "wonderful" establishments!  Feel free to comment and add to my list:

Starbucks:  A line of four is standing at your register.  Four baristas are standing behind the counter.  One is looking down, diligently fixing drinks, one is slowly (and I do mean slowly) attempting to complete a transaction with a gift card.  The other two are standing around talking to another employee, that is off for the day, discussing the schedule.  Mind you, the ones that have a uniform on, are on the clock.  Hello?!  Get to work.  Starbucks is known for being the McDonald's of coffee houses.  Get you in, get you out...find out your preference of coffee, write your name on a cup and keep it moving.  But not this one!  No way, no how.  They're standing around and after about 10 minutes realize the line isn't moving, so one of the two standing around decides to help your fellow baristas!
Cache:  Never a dull moment in cache, as I love the clothes, however; hate their customer service, so I've NEVER returned after my last experience...I enter in cache.  Ready to spend my money and I look around there is not one, not even ONE customer associate on the floor!  They could have been robbed blind, so boosters-There ya' go!  Don't say I never did anything for you!  These mofo's had the nerve to leave me on the floor, for...well, I don't remember; but it was long enough for me to do a complete lap around the store (and said people know how long that is) and then choose outfits to try on.  Then actually go to the back where the dressing rooms are and low and behold out comes this young chick...one her personal CELL PHONE, talking swiftly as if she was Wendy Williams giving the latest information to the other-end caller.  She swayed me to the back, and ushered me into the dressing room, all while never missing a beat in her conversation.  Here's the gist of the convo-she and boyfriend live together, or at least shared a place and his family was coming down for the weekend, namely the mother because she said she didn't want her to stay there.  She ws complaining about the boyfriends needy family and how she's stressed.  Clearly the friend on the other end told her to call the boyfriend and explain her frustration.  And wouldn't you know!  She did just that!  When I got out of the dressing room (by now, only staying in the store out of complete curiousity, er, ok, noseyness)  she was on the phone with the boyfriend, in tears, shouting.  There were mid break-up or something.  I don't know!  All I know is when she got off the phone, she felt the need to give me the 4 uno uno. 
Kay Jewelers:  Hello?!  Aren't you supposed to address clients by the last name, preceded by a Mr. or Mrs.?  For those unsure...allow me to train you!  Hell YES!  It's always Mr. or Mrs. when first speaking with the customer or perhaps Sir or Madam.  I mean, by all means, definitely don't fudge up on the pronounciation of their name. 
BeBe:  It doesn't matter which damn BeBe you purchase something from.  You have the right as a consumer to exchange or return if the merchandise doesn't fit.  Who the hell thinks one bebe is different from another.  Yes...it is more work for you.  That's your job.  Retag it, or send it to the appropriate location!
Small Ma' and Pop Sign Shop in League City:  Please hire someone to work at your front desk that is qualified to answer customer questions about your services and policies.  You'r elosing hefty business.  That is All!
I could go on, but I'm exhausted with the lack of personalization and customer concern in the world.  Being a business owner myself and coming from a family of multiple successful business owners; I'll leave you with this!
 Stick with the BASICS!
  1. Don't be in such a hurry that you do a double, even triple transaction!
  2. Don't call customers or clients by their name if you don't know how to pronounce it or by the wrong name.
  3. Do call in for a personal day, if your attitude is fudged up.
  4. Do spell and grammar check any and ALL written correspondence.
  5. Do keep a smile on your face.
  6. Don't complain or bad-mouth ANYTHING in front of customers!
...and this concludes your BASIC Customer Service Khrystian-Tidbits Training 101.  Thank you for tuning in!