Bounce Back

Its not a waste if at the time you thought it was perfect for you! The "it" I'm referring to could signify anything; that tweed pantsuit, that special charm bracelet your wore with every outfit, your favorite pair of gator shoes, that class you took that you have absolutely no use for, the plaid sofa, that move across country, those extra souvenir shirts you bought, that relationship you've been in for three years (you know the one, that after the first year, you knew it wouldn't last!)...it doesn't matter!! Because at the time, it was clearly something you believed in and wanted to make work!  

 

If anything, think of it as a learning experience! A short segment of your life that was a blessing through teaching you a great lesson. A lesson that only experience...and um...(clears throat) a ton of cash could have taught you. We're too hard on ourselves sometimes! Shoot! Everyone makes mistakes...the key is knowing how to bounce back! Everyone has had major setbacks and disappointments. We've ALL had those "uh oh" moments, but think positively! If you hadn't taken that class that you have absolutely NO use for; you never would have met *Kenny, and if you never met *Kenny, you wouldn't have met *Shirley, and let's face it; had you not met *Shirley, she couldn't have introduced you to *Tim....and *Tim is the one who got you the amazing job, with the company you absolutely LOVE!  

As I say; Life happens...and it's happening with or without you! So buckle up and enjoy the ride...I mean, why so serious?

My Proposal

I never, quite honestly remember blogging about my engagement. There were SO many things going on during that time. From graduating with my Master’s, to family and friends attending my graduation getaway, to the process of purchasing a new home, from beginning work with a new principal...blogging was simply overshadowed and that is disappointing on my part. 

 Now though, on the heels of the 2nd year anniversary of the day he proposed, Saturday, August 20th, I’m blogging about it!

We’d just left my graduation. I’d invited friends and family that could attend to go and travel with us to Lamar University and then on to Lake Charles, Louisiana to stay at the Golden Nugget Resort and Casino. My plan was a weekend getaway filled with surprises, congratulations, and fun but never in a million years would I have imagined my then boyfriend that I’d been dating for three full years had planned to pop the question! Sure we’d discussed the notion. Looked at rings. Went to view homes. Talked marriage plans, our future, kids, where we wanted to live and how we wanted to live before as far back as during the first year of dating. What’s the ideal proposal? You know? All the idealogical yummy talk couples in love have but still, to this day, I wouldn’t have bet five dollars on him proposing at that time. 

After morning graduation our first stop was lunch, followed by a poolside graduation party, then dinner, late drinks and dancing, wake up to a breakfast buffet, pool again and head home...with gambling shuffled in between if guests wanted. Lunch however was shifted greatly slightly when it came time for toasts...and my boyfriend was the one that suggested it👀 He’s social but not that social so that should’ve gotten me, but no! It didn’t. Then my mom wasn’t at the table, for some reason, and we had to wait on her. I could’ve maybe thought something then, but why would I if they’re all about to toast to my accomplishment👀 

When she finally gets to the table he stands and makes me stand too👀 now if I shouldn’t have known then I don’t know what...but still I’m thinking he’s just trying to be extra lol for my graduation lol.

He tells everyone how proud of me he is and how much he loves me, other words that begin to fade because he then drops to one knee👀 That’s it! That’s how the question was popped! In front of my family and friends....and the entire Pappadeaux restaurant. I have pictures, may even have video...but my one bff who is a camera Nazi...we told her to get the bright lights out of our face 🤦🏾‍♀️ so we probably aren’t recorded 😂🤣 If only I’d have known👀...

I was so clueless I didn’t even know until after the fact that he asked my daddy for my hand in marriage before we left to get on the road that morning. And shockingly my dad held onto the secret the entire morning from my mom because he said she’d have given it away 😂🤣

Greg & Vivian

I made your favorite meal! Rosemary steak, garlic mashed potatoes and cream corn. Oh! I almost forgot I also have salad, let me get it.

(In a daze) I’m really not hungry. I’ve got some things to check out before another early morning.

What’s wrong Greg? You haven’t been your talkative self since this morning before work when you checked your email...did negotiations go south? Did something happen at the firm? Talk to me. You’ve never been too upset to eat; especially you’re favorite steak meal.

I don’t want to talk just yet, Vivian.

What do you mean? I’m your wife. If you can’t vent your frustrations of the world to me....who can you talk to? I don’t want to become one of those couples that isolate each other when things seem rough.

(Long pause)

Greg? What is it?

How could you screw my fraternity brother and associate at the firm? 

(Vivian looks shocked) What?!

How could you? This dude and I work alongside each other. This dude and I have gone for drinks after working on cases together. This dude has confided in me personal family issues with his kid, his girlfriend, his parents. I even took his kid to the Astros game.

I-

He’s been around the both of us together. Talking. Laughing. Drinking. And you have the audacity to be screwing him every chance you got. What kind of woman does this type of betrayal to the man that she “loves”? Who are you?

I- 

You know I asked the question...but I don’t want your tacky, ruthless answer! You have nothing to say to me. There’s NO excuse, there’s NO apology worth it. There’s NO explanation! 

Greg. I would never betray you like that.

It’s already done! I saw the pictures. He sent you over a dozen pathetic pics of himself posing like a b-rated Internet prick. Who knows what you’ve been sending him and who has access to it? Some emails came through last week, but it was sent to my junk mail as to why it was just checked. It had all types of messages you two have been sending back and forth to each other. So save your lie and further lies you’re about to conjure up. 

It’s not a lie. I have no idea where this is coming from. He’s obviously pissed that you two will never be friends again because of that Motley case and your promotion. I have no idea what you’re talking about. There’s nothing to lie or conjure up with a meaningless prick. I would never! Don't no where you’re getting this from but we can't fix it with you hearing rumors and bs from who knows where and not being willing to hear me out or get to the bottom of it together. 

Has Vivian betrayed Greg? Why have emails and pictures been sent to Greg? Are there more? Is there more evidence against Vivian that proves her unfaithfulness to Greg?

Delano & Christine

Man! I knew I’d see you again outside of that office building. Wow! How are you?

I’m good. Hello.

You don’t know who I am, do you? 

No. I’m sorry. I don’t recognize you.

You speak to me every Sunday morning as you go into the building.

No. You must be mistaken. I’ve never met you. 

Maybe because I’m in a suit and tie usually and today I look like a bum, in a white tee shirt and shorts. 

No. I just don’t honestly remember.

I’m the one in the Range Rover that pulls up and we speak almost every Sunday morning.

Oh my goodness! Yes! I remember you now. You DO look totally different. Oh my goodness I didn’t recognize you at all.

A lot of people say that. (He smiles) Can I help you with your bags? I mean, as long as your boyfriend wouldn’t be mad. I noticed you’re not wearing a ring.

(She smiles) I don’t have a husband or a boyfriend but I don’t think anyone would be mad at a gentleman helping a lady to her car with bags.

So, do you live around here? 

I do. In the neighborhood over. How about yourself?

I have family over here and I made the store run.

I see. 

So, now that I’ve shown you I’m a gentleman, helped you to your car and all. You’ve told me you don’t have a boyfriend or husband...could I have your number to call you sometime. Take you out. Get to know you better. 

Well...do you have a wife or girlfriend? 

Divorced. 

And the girlfriend part...

Totally unattached. I’d like to get to know you better. 

I’m not used to getting involved with someone divorced. I don’t know. 

Totally my past. She was a good wife. It didn’t work out, so I gave her the house. Nothing more, nothing less. It’s in the past.

How far will this encounter with Delano and Christine go? Are they both actually single and unattached? Find out if there are any loose ends to tie up?

Lamar & Jeanine

I shouldn’t have to beg, barter, and plead with you to do things for or with me Lamar.

Jeanine what are you talking about now? 

Four days ago I asked you to be on daddy duty for 2 hours because of the ultrasound I’m getting this morning. All of a sudden, per your usual, at the last minute you change up the plans we made and tell me I need to take the kids with me and you’ll meet us in the waiting room to watch them. Why?

I have to work! It wasn’t last minute; I told you yesterday.

Yesterday?! It was last night. The appointment is first thing this morning. Last minute from what the original plan was. I asked if you could go in to work a little later like you’ve done plenty of other times when it concerns yourself or other people to help me out and watch the kids. It seems you can help everyone else but your wife and three children!! What’s the big deal?

Who? Who do I do something for-

Every-damn-body else! I’ve told you that a hundred times. I’m tired of rehashing it.

Well ...if you’re so tired GET OUT! I’m sick of your shit!

You get out. This is my house asshole! I live here. 

You ain’t got no motherf@ck!ng house!

Yeah, that’s why you can’t do shit without me concerning this house, so shut up.

Yea ok. You don’t pay shit around here. Tell it to the judge-

You pay the mortgage, HUSBAND! That’s what you supposed to do.

What’s the true cause of the argument between Lamar and Jeanine? Is their marriage irreconcilable? Find out more about Lamar and Jeanine...

Troll Patrol

They can do all this with social media...for FREE...but yet I have to PAY to find out who this no-life, scallywag, vulgar, ghost, scary troll is texting my phone anonymously every 3 months through an annoymous text app?!

How sway? 😏

I’ll keep you posted...unless you already know 😘😒😉

Acrimony

...
Slow start.
Overall a great conversation piece.
They both made immature mistakes at the start of their relationship.
She was wrong.
We ALL have a Robert.
He tried to make it right for the very last time at the divorce hearing.
He was more than fair when it was all said and done.
She tripped out.
Don’t ever, never, not ever, listen to outside “voices” concerning your relationship and how you feel in said relationship.
Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.

Single Girl Gem 121

A woman should FEEL secure, protected, and cherished by the man she says Yes to.

Commandments

When God says move...you must GO! Don’t walk, don’t stutter-step, and most importantly don’t look back because you are sure to fall down.

The REAL in REALity- Mindless Rant

It's been a whole while since I blogged about reality tv.  So here it is in a nutshell.

I've enjoyed Married to Medicine this season.  It has been intensely real.  Dr. Jackie has big decisions to make and women have been making them for decades.  Nothing new.  Quad is tripping.  I'm not in her shoes, and clearly she doesn't want to be either.  I don't advocate divorce, but she doesn't seem to love...or at least like Gregory and I'm sad for their relationship every time they have conflict.  I just know it stems from her not wanting to have babies.
I miss making fun of Lisa Nicole...where is she? LOL  Heavenly is one of those chicks in high school that you just don't have time for with all her antics. And Simone is still screaming lol

Atlanta Housewives just is.  I did agree (for once) with Linethia Leakes.  They should stop asking that married woman about Tyrone.  Once was for television, twice to add the drama, third time and beyond; you're about to cause problems at home and there's really no excuse for it because whether they had something going on in the past or not...they don't now.  He's with Sheree and she's married to Greg.  Speaking of...how is Sheree totally smitten and in love this season, when she was just trying to rekindle a relationship with Bob?  She was even talking about moving him into her house.  Did we all forget? Kenya is all too proud to be a wife, and I'm about sick of hearing about it.  Kim should just permanently dismiss herself, but then who would the ladies band against?  I would say poor Porsha but that girl is making money hand over fist...so she got it!  I still say...Marlo needs to write a book honey!

Beverly Hills are rich women whose husbands take care of them drama.  I still watch it to see the fashion and real estate.

...Really those are the only ones I invest my time into watching during this season.  Which do you watch?  Leave a post about it!

xoxo

Side Chucks

This has obviously always been overshadowed by the side chick, but there is an increasingly large population of men that revel at the desire to be "in a relationship" with married women.  I'll call them side CHUCKS.  You know how badly I wanted to call them the rhyme of chicks, but...come on...this is a family show, and I try to be as decent and in order as humanly possible as often as is necessary :-)

I was asked to be a panelist on a discussion of women including; wives, singles, and side chicks.
...I got to thinking...

There is always controversy surrounding the side whore...er...I mean...chick.  SHE is always on the receiving end of scrutiny, even though the man in the said-relationship is actually the guilty party to the betrayal.  SHE gets all the air time, songs written and dedications, plays surrounding, and movies chronicling the lifestyle.  SHE even gets a voice on a panel to speak in hopes of getting some sort of vindication.
But the side CHUCK is REAL.  He lives.  He breathes.  He miserably lives in the shadow of a woman's husband.  He hopelessly slick-talks these men's wives and desperately sexts them all the while she's actually with her husband.  He outrageously courts other men's wives and make futile plans when he thinks her husband is away. He undresses her in his mind and vividly embraces her through depressing visions because more often than not, she's never leaving her husband for him.
He may never want her to himself either.  He's the weak-willed, lazy type that you wouldn't want to marry either way because in the end there would be an upsetting loss.
 
Honestly speaking, if not just for myself, I would have never imagined men would want married women.  Not just desire, as in, "I'm attracted to a woman and she happens to be married", or "I never officially had my chance with her and now she's married so I'll wait on old dude to mess up", but actually...wanting to date...talk on the phone...court...sleep with...whichever is clever when her husband is not around! 
Just writing that makes me sick to my stomach on both ends of this disgusting spectrum.

Call it naivety, but I thought if nothing but for the simple fact of that egotistical macho façade some men put on; surely they wouldn't want another man's wife? Hunty!  I was wrong.  They are desperate, disgusting, and damaged.
There is really no excuse for men OR women to do it.  I'm just here to blog the reality that is: Some men and women prefer to be side pieces and it's not exclusive to one gender as so often depicted socially.