"Up" Kind of Love

Isn't it funny that in the "moment" that you're in your relationship with someone you think; this is absolutely A.mazing!  He/she is the one for me.  I am in love!  What the heezy was I ever doing with that (insert insult here) in the first place.  I wasted so much time on that (insert another insult here) and all this time I could have been living this great life with (insert sickening mushy name here). 
Sound familiar?!  Well whether that's your case or not; whether it happened in this relationship, or you realized it after the 7 year crush you had on the guy that doesn't know you exist; it's happened to some, to most, to the BEST of us.

A few months ago, I was having this conversation with a friend of mine about love...if we really believed in it.  Now don't go getting your panties in a bunch.  God IS love! Yes we know that and we believe whole-heartedly in God's love for us and within us.  It was just a simple conversation about relationships; the lack there of, and the common misconceptions of said relationships.  So before you go bible thumping to me; let's keep it real, sane and remove all the holier than thou (oh no, not the preacher's kid) judgments for the purposes of this discussion.

~Now back to our regularly scheduled program~

My friend and I both agreed in real love; but I then began to question if there was really a such thing as a true love.  You know?  The forever love.  The kind that you read about, hear songs about, watch movies about; and even hear the old wives' tales about the man that only had one true love and when his young wife died an untimely death-he never loved again (story of my great grand-father R.I.P). 

I just wonder.  Because nowadays, you hear the stories and have the friends that fall in love at first sight and marry after 3 months.   Then divorce after 6 months.  You hear the stories and have the friends that date and love for 8 years and then marry.  Divorce in 3 years.  But truly, that's all facts and figures, because nowadays you just can't tell.  People aren't made up of what they used to be made of.  Men and women, alike, don't sugar coat or pussy foot around issues like they did back in the day.  There is no more of the; Don't ask. Don't tell policies.  People aren't playing games with that mess anymore.  We're asking and we're telling even if you don't want to hear it!  So I'll leave the marriage issue alone and just keep with the discussion of true love.  Strength and length of marriage is a whole 'nother blog...inwhich I don't even have the strength to partake in.

Back to true love. 

I just figure.  You get into a relationship.  You fall in love (and for some vice versa...anywho).  You maintain a relationship.  You believe it's the BEST relationship ever and you believe you've never felt a love like this one right now.  Until, that is you do.  Because...you break up!  Whoa!  Blind-sided!  He's or she's not the person you like to have believed. 

You start again.  You get into a relationship.  You fall in love (and for some vice versa...moving on). You maintain a relationship. You believe it's the BEST relationship ever and you believe you've never felt a love like this one right now. Until, that is you do. Because...you break up!  Damn!!  Not again!!  You thought you knew him or her so well.

You decide; I'm taking a break.  I need time for myself.  I fall hard and they just can't accept me for me.  They don't deserve my love.  That is until... You get into a relationship. You fall in love (and for some vice versa...whatever). You maintain a relationship. You believe it's the BEST relationship ever and you believe you've never felt a love like this one right now. Until, that is you do. Because...you break up! You think he or she was perfect. Our families got along, we were really on the trail to marriage.  Looking at rings and all :(

Enough is enough you think.  You've had enough heart break for one person to stand.  Maybe you're destined to be a bachelor/bachelorette for life.  Nothing wrong with that.  Lots of people have a great life being single.  You plan the perfect getaway with your friends!  It's time to get foot loose and fancy free in the city.  And why not?!  You're young!  You're single!  You've got a great career and family and personality!  Time to put it to use.  That is until...You get into a relationship. You fall in love (and for some vice versa...enough already!!!). You maintain a relationship. You believe it's the BEST relationship ever and you believe you've never felt a love like this one right now. Until, that is you do. Because...you break up!

Do you see my pattern of logic?  Each time you are in a relationship; you figure that's the love of your life.  your soul-mate! The one God put on this planet specifically for you!  Until, that is, you break up; and he's or she's NOT!!!  I just simply believe that whomever you're in a relationship with at the time is your true love!  So there it is.  Is there ever really a true love?  Is there a difference between true and real love? How do you know?  What happens if and when you're not in a relationship with your "true love" anymore?  What will you say then?  How do you truly know you're in love?  What?  Is it that you miss them even before they leave?  Because you can miss a city or a homie like that!  Is it because you get sick at the mere thought of losing them?  Give me something really expensive and I don't necessarily mean monetarily and I bet I'll get real sick at the thought of losing it too!  I mean, honestly, this is a real subject matter for me.  I just don't think I believe in the hog wash.  So let me know your thoughts!

~XOXO~

Happy "True" Love Moments Lol!

p.s. the title is dedicated to the oscar winning movie "Up".  Watch it and you'll understand why I titled it that.

Diet Schmiet!

So I'll be the first to admit that as I get...er (clears throat) older, and by older I mean closer to 30 (apologies to those that are sensitive or touchy about their oldness lol) I realize it's not so easy for me to eat, eat and eat and not gain a pound.  My size 0 and 2 jeans just don't fit me the way they are supposed to.  Let's face it...I can barely get them over my thighs.  In fact, on a good day, they fit me snug, and by snug, I mean too tight!  I can barely walk or breathe.  I mean I'm busting up out those things!!!!  (literally) Insert shrill scream here! 
I absolutely can't stand dieting.  In fact, it depresses me to know someone around me is on a diet! (truly exaggerrating, but really...) Why?!  Why would you willingly deprive yourself of life's great pleasures, unless health-wise you must in order for survival?!  I can't tell a lie-I scream for ice cream.  Pasta, starches, breads, butter...mmmm (okay I sould like Raspusha LOL!) I like to have a glass of wine every now and again, and I'm smitten with happy hours!  They make my day brighter.  I know, I know...alcohol puts the weight on you.  But I figure if you work out regularly, you can stand to indulge in some of life's greatest pleasures. (or maybe that's just something I came up with)  Please all you health nuts and gurus don't start sending me hate mail.  I'm just saying...(tongue out here)  I like good food, and I figure so long as you eat good food in moderation and work out regularly...we should be fine.  Right?!
I acquired a gym membership to 24 hour fitness around June of 2009.  Suffice to say, I didn't utilize it the way it was intended and it turned into a big old waste of money.  Despite the fact I would seldom go to the gym.  I found myself gaining more weight and NOT losing!  Yikes!
You see, I figured, 24 hour fitness would be perfect for me.  If I was up at 2 in the morning, wasting time, I could easily burn off that energy by working out.  During the summer, just on a whim I could rise and shine and go sit in the sauna or whirlpool if nothing else.  Sweat away my excess phat!  I could even get involved in one of the famous classes, like zumba, I'd heard rave reviews on.  That was the plan-until it wasn't :(
If I had to be honest at this very moment.  I would say between June and December of 2009 I may have utilized my membership 20 times; and really that's generous! 
Well alas, I, with the help of unsaid others; have devised specific plans to lose weight. Well...workout if you will.  Lifestyle committment really.  At this time, I'm actually working on a 12-day physical and spirtual work-out!  I'm on day 3.  Each work-out begins with a mile run, then moves on to 6 different stations working specific areas of the body.  For instance; today I began with my mile run (I could only run 3 laps straight...I had to power walk the last lap.  I'm sorry but I'm out of shape for real, for real).  I then moved into a light stretch and then for an hour I get my pick from a pre-made list of 3 different excerises for my arms and 3 different excerises for my shoulders.  (Yesterday I did; jump rope, lunges, and mountain climbing)
Throughout the 12 days I am supposed to not eat beef or pork (well that's really not that hard, considering my favorite food is seafood!  I could easily be some type of vegetarian lol; although I did eat some roast on the first day EGAD!! Don't say anything!), drink at least 8 bottles of water (now's where it gets difficult , because I loathe water.  I just can't drink it for some strange reason!), eat at least two peices of fruit of my choice (yum) and pray or read/recite scripture in between each station of workout! (yeah, prayer comes in real handy when I feel like I'm losing my breathe and needing to lay out in between these darn excersises, so thats' right up my alley!!) Thank God!!
In all honesty though, I've felt good about the workout!  I haven't been excrusciatingly sore, like I imagined.  I feel good and my body is beginning to seem alittle trimmer.  I can't fit into a 0 yet, these ding dang on thighs just won't let me BE, but I am fitting comfortably back into a 2.  It doesn't take me long!  I've even been told the dimples in my cheeks are starting to take form again LOL!  Sad, but true!   So I'll post before and after pics once the 12 days are up (that's contingent on the fact that I actually last....aaaaaannnnnd lose the weight!!)
Wish me luck!!

St. Paddy's Day!!!

So basically the shirt say's, "I'm not Irish.  Kiss me anyway!"

Happy St. Patrick's Day!!

(Taken 2009 Hawaii Spring Break)

And YES!!  I'm wearing it again today (don't judge me)

ENERGY!!!

Here's alil' something to get you through the week!!!
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Whenever you feel drained or tired or out of place; just think...What Would Diddy Do?! WWDD? Make it happen, is what he'd do! Sometimes the man doesn't sleep for days upon days or he's flying from coast to coast...but he still presses on! You've seen the reality show! You read his twitter! There's no need to remind you! So, when we wake up in the morning: Let's Get IT!

XOXO,
Happy Success!

Reason for the Season

This is definitely one of my favorite seasons....CRAWFISH!! The start of spring until pretty much so, I can't remember if it's Labor Day or Memorial Day...but it's the time my family boils hot, spicy and delicious crawfish!! I peel and eat 'em all day long!!!

UnCouth!

I think there are some people that just absolutely have no manners!! Uncouth is the word I use!

1. Imagine coming home one weekend from college during your freshman year to attend a fair. Your mother is talking to a friend of hers from high school...you approach. Your mom introduces you. You say, "Hello. Nice to meet you." The "friend" whom you've never met before. Well she remembers you from when you were a baby, says, "My! College is agreeing with you." (this in reference to the fact that she thinks you look like Elsie the moo cow!) I mean really! Are you serious?! Did you really just say that to someone you're just now actually meeting?

So when I just stare at her and don't respond. I'm the rude one! The audacity!

1. 2. Picture being out of town with a friend. You're surrounded by unfamilar settings and unfamiliar people. You're having a great time, but you are ready to go. It's 5 am. You catch a cab. You're seperating from the new people you've met through another mutual friend that met you. While you're saying your goodbyes the jack ass with you (friend) tries to bargain an already cheap cab ride home. The cab driver then refuses to take either of you home, because they believe you don't have your fare!

Now when you go off on the friend for the sheer embarrassment, you're bougie! Mortified!

1. 3. Think of a time you're attempting to enjoy lunch with your collegues or co-workers. Your lunch is divine, the conversation is going well. All of a sudden the butt munch sitting across from you blows their nose at the table! Seriously dude...you're going to just do that?! And keep going, without so much as an, "Excuse me."

So you don't eat in the faculty lounge anymore! You're anti-social!

1. 4. Suppose you are at a social function. A food tasting for a catering company, let's say. You've been invited with your significant other (or opposite sex friend) without any pre-requisites. When you arrive however; yes it's an event for the catering company, but also for florists, make-up artists, photographers and cake designers. You indulge in everything. That is, in fact, what you were invited to do. In doing this you are approached by a person whom you have never met and they ask you about your marital status. You oblige the conversation and say you're single. Next thing they say is (the person that doesn't know you) "Well what you waiting on. I'm trying to get you married off. Marriage is a beautiful thing, you know?!" In your mind you may think...no one asked you or mind your own business or even, lady who are you?

However, in an attempt to not be rude, you laugh it off and just say;"No. Please don't do that." All with a smile. No, no, no, no! You hurt her feelings! I mean what is that?!

1. 5. Don't ask me how much I pay for something.

1. 6. Matter of a fact don't ask me personal questions.

1. 7. Don't invite yourself places.

1. 8. Don't dig through someone's personal belongings.

I mean where do people get off?! Where are the manners? Who taught you social skills? What ever happened to the art of communication? I'm sure this will be one of those blog entries I continually upkeep :)
Happy Tuesday!

!Word to the Wise!

Please be careful in life with those that you call your friend; those that you associate with, those you confide in, those who you enjoy a good time with. A honest and true friend is rare. The friend that you can count and depend on. And there are so many magnitudes of friendship. Many people believe in the saying keep your friends close, but you're enemies even closer. Well I don't need an enemy close to me. ( in fact, remove them please and thank you!) lol! I also think it's rather unhealthy to have frienemies!

I say be careful and tread lightly with folks you call a friend because there are some people in the world that are miserable. They weren't born in misery (well not all) and weren't born miserable (well not all) but they have gotten miserable with age and time. It could be due to life circumstances or poor judgement on their part, but whatever their excuse; they're miserable! Let's face it: Misery mos def loves company. So now; they'll pretend to be your friend: laugh at your jokes, extend a shoulder to cry on, offer you sound advice, and wish you well in all your endeavors. However they're the same friend that hopes you fail, gives the advice they followed to get them in their shitty predicament ( I just love that metaphor, haha), laughs when you cry, and gives a side eye to your jokes! Sound familiar?!...Maybe not. Your "friend" is probably well disguised. Or revealed as the frienemy!

The frienemies are just that! There's no special formula to them...they are the enemy that attempts to be your friend. Many times they are so envious of you...your life; they desperately just want to be around you...know you...understand you. They are misguided and don't know how to be a friend! So...They challenge everything you stand for! Some of them don't just challenge; they actually work double time to disprove, discredit, and flat out dis-count you. Some people thrive on a competitive edge; however, they don't actually challenge to uplift you what so ever. Their main concern or goal is to crush you under their heel! Sound harsh?! It's because it is!

The next is the age old saying: keep friends close and enemies closer-WHY!?? Please somebody that believes in that comment and explain! Enemies aren't in your life for anything other than to be a footstool, so accept it, allow the Forward Motion (notice my plug ;) and leave them there! In fact, having that enemy or hater should just drive you further along! The difference between a hater and an enemy is their approach!

At least the hater is bold enough to reveal themselves and make it known, meanwhile; you probably have someone in your life right now that's been a hater since Pre-k! SMDH! so be careful with your inner circle. You don't have to dismiss friends, you'll just be cognizant of the people you trust with your life. Aspire to surround yourself with positive, uplifting, good and whole-some people! You'll be glad you did!

"Change your attitude, change your life!"

~Khrystian Nichole