Thursday, March 18, 2010

"Up" Kind of Love

Isn't it funny that in the "moment" that you're in your relationship with someone you think; this is absolutely A.mazing!  He/she is the one for me.  I am in love!  What the heezy was I ever doing with that (insert insult here) in the first place.  I wasted so much time on that (insert another insult here) and all this time I could have been living this great life with (insert sickening mushy name here). 
Sound familiar?!  Well whether that's your case or not; whether it happened in this relationship, or you realized it after the 7 year crush you had on the guy that doesn't know you exist; it's happened to some, to most, to the BEST of us.
A few months ago, I was having this conversation with a friend of mine about love...if we really believed in it.  Now don't go getting your panties in a bunch.  God IS love! Yes we know that and we believe whole-heartedly in God's love for us and within us.  It was just a simple conversation about relationships; the lack there of, and the common misconceptions of said relationships.  So before you go bible thumping to me; let's keep it real, sane and remove all the holier than thou (oh no, not the preacher's kid) judgments for the purposes of this discussion.
~Now back to our regularly scheduled program~
My friend and I both agreed in real love; but I then began to question if there was really a such thing as a true love.  You know?  The forever love.  The kind that you read about, hear songs about, watch movies about; and even hear the old wives' tales about the man that only had one true love and when his young wife died an untimely death-he never loved again (story of my great grand-father R.I.P). 
I just wonder.  Because nowadays, you hear the stories and have the friends that fall in love at first sight and marry after 3 months.   Then divorce after 6 months.  You hear the stories and have the friends that date and love for 8 years and then marry.  Divorce in 3 years.  But truly, that's all facts and figures, because nowadays you just can't tell.  People aren't made up of what they used to be made of.  Men and women, alike, don't sugar coat or pussy foot around issues like they did back in the day.  There is no more of the; Don't ask. Don't tell policies.  People aren't playing games with that mess anymore.  We're asking and we're telling even if you don't want to hear it!  So I'll leave the marriage issue alone and just keep with the discussion of true love.  Strength and length of marriage is a whole 'nother blog...inwhich I don't even have the strength to partake in.
Back to true love. 
I just figure.  You get into a relationship.  You fall in love (and for some vice versa...anywho).  You maintain a relationship.  You believe it's the BEST relationship ever and you believe you've never felt a love like this one right now.  Until, that is you do.  Because...you break up!  Whoa!  Blind-sided!  He's or she's not the person you like to have believed. 
You start again.  You get into a relationship.  You fall in love (and for some vice versa...moving on). You maintain a relationship. You believe it's the BEST relationship ever and you believe you've never felt a love like this one right now. Until, that is you do. Because...you break up!  Damn!!  Not again!!  You thought you knew him or her so well.
You decide; I'm taking a break.  I need time for myself.  I fall hard and they just can't accept me for me.  They don't deserve my love.  That is until... You get into a relationship. You fall in love (and for some vice versa...whatever). You maintain a relationship. You believe it's the BEST relationship ever and you believe you've never felt a love like this one right now. Until, that is you do. Because...you break up! You think he or she was perfect. Our families got along, we were really on the trail to marriage.  Looking at rings and all :(
Enough is enough you think.  You've had enough heart break for one person to stand.  Maybe you're destined to be a bachelor/bachelorette for life.  Nothing wrong with that.  Lots of people have a great life being single.  You plan the perfect getaway with your friends!  It's time to get foot loose and fancy free in the city.  And why not?!  You're young!  You're single!  You've got a great career and family and personality!  Time to put it to use.  That is until...You get into a relationship. You fall in love (and for some vice versa...enough already!!!). You maintain a relationship. You believe it's the BEST relationship ever and you believe you've never felt a love like this one right now. Until, that is you do. Because...you break up!
Do you see my pattern of logic?  Each time you are in a relationship; you figure that's the love of your life.  your soul-mate! The one God put on this planet specifically for you!  Until, that is, you break up; and he's or she's NOT!!!  I just simply believe that whomever you're in a relationship with at the time is your true love!  So there it is.  Is there ever really a true love?  Is there a difference between true and real love? How do you know?  What happens if and when you're not in a relationship with your "true love" anymore?  What will you say then?  How do you truly know you're in love?  What?  Is it that you miss them even before they leave?  Because you can miss a city or a homie like that!  Is it because you get sick at the mere thought of losing them?  Give me something really expensive and I don't necessarily mean monetarily and I bet I'll get real sick at the thought of losing it too!  I mean, honestly, this is a real subject matter for me.  I just don't think I believe in the hog wash.  So let me know your thoughts!
~XOXO~
Happy "True" Love Moments Lol!

p.s. the title is dedicated to the oscar winning movie "Up".  Watch it and you'll understand why I titled it that.

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