Sunday, March 1, 2015

New Relationship Rule 31

You either meet them where they are and bring them where you both want to go or let them go. 
It's a simple rule. Stop feeling the need to "change" someone or some "thing" about them. How you met them, is who they are. If you desire a "change" in them you don't express that by demeaning what you fell for...you begin EXPOSURE. 
What does that mean? 
It means: you meet someone dressed a particular way. Let's say; suits and ties. So now that you've initially met them and you're dating; you "decide" they should stop wearing suit and ties all the time and loosen up there look. Perhaps, you decide, that they should wear more casual clothes, especially to a barbeque. Well, instead of rudely insisting that they change and stop wearing suits and ties all the time; how about you BUY them what you desire them to wear? Offer a gift or two. 
You met someone that wears their hair curly, curly, curly and you'd like to see them try a "new" style. Perhaps, you think, they should change it up and go straight. Book them an appointment to a local salon and encourage them to try the new style you'd like to see them in. 
You met someone a coffee shop yet you like an occasional cocktail. Instead of complaining to them how "bored" you are with going to "quiet" places; plan an exciting day or evening out. 
The point is: how you meet a person is how you met them. I'm not saying you can't desire change, but instead of being annoyed with the person you fell for not changing...try some EXPOSURE before you say regrettable things to them that critiques the person they are. In the long run it'll save on hurt feelings, annoyed stares, and uncomfortable debates. 

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