Haywire

Went haywire!! That movie was the worst, slowest, intoxicatingly dull movie I think I've seen in awhile!! I wanted my money back and didn't even PAY for it!
It used A-list names like Micheal Douglas and Antonio Banderas, tween eye candy, Channing Tatum and Mr. Man, Bill Paxton to draw us to the film and then left us with a morbid undertone of three minute snippets of the characters dialogue! How rude?! (in my Michelle Tanner voice)
The entire first HOUR moved in slow motion and included very little dialogue to move the story. We were left to decipher bits and pieces of a series of badly directed shots from a narcissist whom clearly believed story-boarding his way through the movie would suffice! It did NOT!
The writing, though not horrendous, was however less than mediocre and childlike imaginative; considering my eight year old cousin could have created a more thrilling and suspenseful version of that mayhem!
All in all it gets a rotten tomato thrown into the face of all whom supported, financed, or backed Hollywood into making that ode to 1920's silent film expression!