What exactly is a keeper?
You hear people say it in regards to a proper significant other. Someone wanting or needing to be kept, or someone that is worthy of keeping around for as long as you humanly can!
That brings about the question: What makes or distinguishes a Keeper?
Is it person that gives you butterflies in your stomach? Does the person accept you flaws and ALL? Does a Keeper catch you by surprise or off-guard? Will a Keeper maintain the element of surprise? Do you recognize a Keeper when you first meet them? How does one become a Keeper?
I think just as with beauty; it's in the eye of the beholder! A Keeper keeps a smile in your face and your heart pattering. Sometimes you don't even know how the Keeper got there (as Deborah Cox sang) but you're grateful that they're apart of your life!
xoxo,
Monday, May 7, 2012
Sunday, May 6, 2012
Sometimes all you'd like is the person that wronged you to ACKNOWLEDGE that they've hurt or upset you. You can't control other people and their actions or reactions so there's no need on asking for acknowledgment, an apology or even a change, but life would be so much smoother if everyone treated each other as they want to be treated.
The dictionary defines acknowledgement as a noun in five forms:
n.
1. The act of admitting or owning to something.
2. Recognition of another's existence, validity, authority, or right.
3. An answer or response in return for something done.
4. An expression of thanks or a token of appreciation.
5. A formal declaration made to authoritative witnesses to ensure legal validity.
Most times ALL it takes is recognizing someone's hurt, pain or feelings. Even if you are hell-bent on thinking or knowing you've done absolutely nothing wrong, you can't control how you make another person FEEL...simply acknowledge their feelings and move on.
Now; there are some people that hold grudges and harbor resentment forever no matter what you say or do and that's their headache. At least you've done your part in acknowledging how you may have made them feel and explaining your intent. You can sleep well at night!
Let it go already!
The dictionary defines acknowledgement as a noun in five forms:
n.
1. The act of admitting or owning to something.
2. Recognition of another's existence, validity, authority, or right.
3. An answer or response in return for something done.
4. An expression of thanks or a token of appreciation.
5. A formal declaration made to authoritative witnesses to ensure legal validity.
Most times ALL it takes is recognizing someone's hurt, pain or feelings. Even if you are hell-bent on thinking or knowing you've done absolutely nothing wrong, you can't control how you make another person FEEL...simply acknowledge their feelings and move on.
Now; there are some people that hold grudges and harbor resentment forever no matter what you say or do and that's their headache. At least you've done your part in acknowledging how you may have made them feel and explaining your intent. You can sleep well at night!
Let it go already!
Thursday, May 3, 2012
The Communication Challenge
I'm not going to say, "men are stupid", or "men have no understanding" or "men never get it", but the saying is, "Nobody can read your mind!" Which holds true today, tomorrow and forever more. Men, no matter how pompous they may seem are, in fact, NOT gods! As women, especially in a relationship, no matter if you're first dating, getting to know each other, engaged or married have to COMMUNICATE our needs, wants, desires, aspirations...I mean, the whole shebang!
Case in point:
You can NOT implement a ten-day plan (see Two Can Play That Game) without the man having a clue that he’s done something wrong! There is no such thing as a silent treatment if the two of you rarely speak as it is. It’s not effective!!! How would he know, you’re not speaking to him; if you don’t speak on a regular? What his mind says is that, “She must be seeing someone else because I haven’t heard from her." or even "I wonder how she's doing." or "Dag! This play-off game is good, the Heat going to make the finals! I just know it!" (smile)
The man doesn’t automatically know to make the first move. I’ve said it time and time again: We live in a day and age where women are bold, if not bolder than men, so men are accustomed to interested parties calling first, texting first, asking them on dates first, and any other firsts you could imagine…that’s just the world we live in. Get used to it! Don’t play games…especially with your heart!! Communicate! Allow someone to hear where you’re coming from. Whether they agree or disagree you’ve taken the first step towards healthy, active communication. You’ll never resolve issues resting on an assumption that being silent will change a situation. All great changes occur with voices, speeches, public debates, marches, signs, movements!
Challenge yourself to the Communication Movement. Address issues and concerns in a non-confrontational manner. Every issue doesn’t have to be an attack or a negative encounter. Be creative and explore options to help another person, at the very least, empathize with your feelings and concerns.
Good luck in Love!
Case in point:
You can NOT implement a ten-day plan (see Two Can Play That Game) without the man having a clue that he’s done something wrong! There is no such thing as a silent treatment if the two of you rarely speak as it is. It’s not effective!!! How would he know, you’re not speaking to him; if you don’t speak on a regular? What his mind says is that, “She must be seeing someone else because I haven’t heard from her." or even "I wonder how she's doing." or "Dag! This play-off game is good, the Heat going to make the finals! I just know it!" (smile)
The man doesn’t automatically know to make the first move. I’ve said it time and time again: We live in a day and age where women are bold, if not bolder than men, so men are accustomed to interested parties calling first, texting first, asking them on dates first, and any other firsts you could imagine…that’s just the world we live in. Get used to it! Don’t play games…especially with your heart!! Communicate! Allow someone to hear where you’re coming from. Whether they agree or disagree you’ve taken the first step towards healthy, active communication. You’ll never resolve issues resting on an assumption that being silent will change a situation. All great changes occur with voices, speeches, public debates, marches, signs, movements!
Challenge yourself to the Communication Movement. Address issues and concerns in a non-confrontational manner. Every issue doesn’t have to be an attack or a negative encounter. Be creative and explore options to help another person, at the very least, empathize with your feelings and concerns.
Good luck in Love!
Monday, April 30, 2012
Work it Out
Going through the hustle and bustle of work and just plain old life can cause anyone to get weary or tired and neglect taking care of our bodies! For some of us, working out is easier said than done! Here are some useful, helpful ways to tie exercise into your daily routine:
-Add extra steps as often as possible. Always take the stairs, park farther away than your usual up-close spot, instead of emailing a coworker, go talk to them (it's a lost art)!
-Sit up straight, no slouching!
-While sitting do arms curls.
-Walk around and read those papers, instead of looking down on your desk all day.
-Do squat reps of 10 in intervals of 10 throughout your 8 hour day.
-Drink plenty of water to stay hydrated.
Here's to staying fit!!
XOXO
-Add extra steps as often as possible. Always take the stairs, park farther away than your usual up-close spot, instead of emailing a coworker, go talk to them (it's a lost art)!
-Sit up straight, no slouching!
-While sitting do arms curls.
-Walk around and read those papers, instead of looking down on your desk all day.
-Do squat reps of 10 in intervals of 10 throughout your 8 hour day.
-Drink plenty of water to stay hydrated.
Here's to staying fit!!
XOXO
Saturday, April 7, 2012
...Without Spot or Wrinkle
My heart sank as the ringing of my cell phone began: no rest for the weary as I attempted to get in a last moment of sleep before tackling my work day at the gallery. Looking at the phone it was Trevor. You'd think I'd be excited that it was the love of my life but I was not in a mood to talk with him. I'd been in an emotional tug of war ever since the fathers day barbecue. Do I love him? I love him not! This is no secret to either of us since the emotional game of Russian roulette had been played with my heart for the last 6 months! As I pulled the last imaginary petal in my mind, the words I love him were whispered by me as I answered the phone.
"Hello." I said enthusiastically, as I'm realizing I do in fact love him, or I wouldn't possibly have put up with all of his nonsense this long if I didn't.
"Hey. How you doing?" his voice on the other line summoned as if we hadn't just kissed each other goodnight less than twelve hours before.
"I'm doing good, you?!" I questioned, already assuming that bright and early, just like the clock work of the Saturday morning metro, he was about to say, "I'm here!" at my house ready to invade my personal space and take over whatever plans I did or didn't have for the day. To the ultimate contrary he says, "I got some bad news."
"What." I inquired. Certainly after our, what felt like, turbulent relationship; there could be no such thing...
"I'm in jail."
I was wrong! Unequivocally wrong! Jail! How?! Why?! When?! Where?! The three seconds I paused to wrap my head around the statement seemed like an eternity! All of a sudden I felt hopeless, alone, sad, angry, confused, relieved, punked, lethargic all at the same time and no one real reason could I think for any of my emotions.
"What happened?! Why?!" I tried to sound calm, as I wanted to believe this was some type of sick joke that was going to end with a wonderful surprise of bananas foster, balloons, flowers or anything other than the alternative!
"Well...
___________________________________
...Give me feedback! That's one of the story lines in my book
xoxo,
Khrystian Nichole
"Hello." I said enthusiastically, as I'm realizing I do in fact love him, or I wouldn't possibly have put up with all of his nonsense this long if I didn't.
"Hey. How you doing?" his voice on the other line summoned as if we hadn't just kissed each other goodnight less than twelve hours before.
"I'm doing good, you?!" I questioned, already assuming that bright and early, just like the clock work of the Saturday morning metro, he was about to say, "I'm here!" at my house ready to invade my personal space and take over whatever plans I did or didn't have for the day. To the ultimate contrary he says, "I got some bad news."
"What." I inquired. Certainly after our, what felt like, turbulent relationship; there could be no such thing...
"I'm in jail."
I was wrong! Unequivocally wrong! Jail! How?! Why?! When?! Where?! The three seconds I paused to wrap my head around the statement seemed like an eternity! All of a sudden I felt hopeless, alone, sad, angry, confused, relieved, punked, lethargic all at the same time and no one real reason could I think for any of my emotions.
"What happened?! Why?!" I tried to sound calm, as I wanted to believe this was some type of sick joke that was going to end with a wonderful surprise of bananas foster, balloons, flowers or anything other than the alternative!
"Well...
___________________________________
...Give me feedback! That's one of the story lines in my book
xoxo,
Khrystian Nichole
Wednesday, March 28, 2012
New Relationship Rule
Everybody has a past, that's what make you who you are. Each relationship you enter, in a perfect world, should be began with a clean slate and NO misconceptions or lingering skeletons. Unfortunately, however; that's not always the case. Know when to be candidly open and when minor details and trivial nuances can be laid to rest!
Word to the wise; if it will affect your current relationship: DISCLOSE
If it will NOT affect your current relationship: leave well enough alone
Here are two specific examples of when to DISCLOSE and when to leave alone::
1. I was kicked out of student council in 7th grade for getting into a fight at the dance we hosted. (Leave alone)
2. I currently have a restraining order on me for a bar fight I had a few months before I met you. (DISCLOSE)
See the difference?!
Word to the wise; if it will affect your current relationship: DISCLOSE
If it will NOT affect your current relationship: leave well enough alone
Here are two specific examples of when to DISCLOSE and when to leave alone::
1. I was kicked out of student council in 7th grade for getting into a fight at the dance we hosted. (Leave alone)
2. I currently have a restraining order on me for a bar fight I had a few months before I met you. (DISCLOSE)
See the difference?!
Tuesday, March 27, 2012
Crawfish Catastrophe!!
I called myself craving crawfish and went down to Kemah. Needless to say, it was a catastrophic catastrophe of epic proportion!!! Word to the wise to all crawfish conneisours whether you boil them or just enjoy them...they must be purged and cleaned several times before seasoning and serving!!!
God bless America, God bless the Swamp Shack, and God bless the poor souls that believe the Swamp Shack has great crawfish; a.k.a the man that told my friend and I they were good and the waiter (whom i can't really blame because he's paid to advertise) however; one dip into the butter with that crawfish and it tasted like you're taking a bite out of sh$t! Literally!!!!! I immediately STOPPED chewing!! Better luck next time for me because that was NOT hot!!!
God bless America, God bless the Swamp Shack, and God bless the poor souls that believe the Swamp Shack has great crawfish; a.k.a the man that told my friend and I they were good and the waiter (whom i can't really blame because he's paid to advertise) however; one dip into the butter with that crawfish and it tasted like you're taking a bite out of sh$t! Literally!!!!! I immediately STOPPED chewing!! Better luck next time for me because that was NOT hot!!!
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