Jackie Robinson Year

 2022.  Whelp, this year has been more of a doozy than I care to share.  The loss of my brother totally, if not completely, put life and all other things into perspective for me.  I'd like to think I'm more tolerable, forgiving, even easy going.  Today is the first day of December.  I usually party the entire month, and I'm sure in some fashion I will.  The closer to the fourth day of the month of December we get, the more I ponder on my Jackie Robinson year, the more I think of a quote he once said:

"Above anything else, I hate to lose."

Honestly, I don't think anyone goes around life loving to lose.  The quote is not prolific in any way, it's just a very REAL and honest statement.  He was a ball player.  He meant what he said, and the only thing he expected to do, which made him a legendary ball player was to get on base and knock every hit out the park.  At least in stating above anything else, he hated to lose is my best estimation of the quote.  It's what I'm taking from the quote, and it's what I mean when I say:  It's my Jackie Robinson year!

Jackie Robinson responded to opposition, resistance, and barriers with GREATNESS! He didn't raise any bars.  He SET the bar!  A trailblazer.  He planted seeds and through his hard work, not only watched his seeds grow, but enjoyed the fruits of his seeds so much so he made room for his family to eat as well!

My Jackie Robinson year! The countdown begins and I'm ready to knock it out the park!

photo courtesy of Google and 42 movie

Mistress Mishap

Some mistresses tends to make themselves feel better or validate their situation to their friends and family in the thick of involvement with a married man. Especially those that see themselves as “a good woman and I know I’m a good woman”

So…”your” man tells you he’s not married, only caveat being- he can’t spend the night with you or leaves in the middle of the night or early morning to “get back home”

He continually has to “explain” to a woman he’s not with anymore 👀 

You have witnessed his conversations over the phone and they are not that of a single, AVAILABLE, man especially when he speaks to his wife🙄 

HERE’S A GLARING DING DONG:

You, yourself, have lied when confronted by his wife🙄

He’s told you his wife no longer lives in the “marital home”🤦🏾‍♀️ then why does he explain himself to "her"  

They’re not together but he’s expressed to you “she’s not ready for the kids to meet you” and you are perfectly ok with the explanation

You actually take pleasure at hearing him degrade or disrespect his wife and the relationship he states they have “had” when conversing with you.

You fight with him incessantly about why his “ex” calls all times of the night. 

You fight so badly that you go days not speaking 😏 

Of course you’re not speaking…HE’S WITH HIS WIFE!

It’s understandable that a woman can want a man so bad that she’s willing to believe anything that particular man says. Especially lies. No one will fault a woman that gets manipulated by a man that blatantly lies.  You are subject to fall victim or become prey to his petty, despicable betrayal.

BUT that’s not who this post is about...

This post is for women that KNOWINGLY believe lies because she wants the man and the trumped up future she has formulated in her feeble mind. 

You ma’am, need to reevaluate, and reassess yourself. Take pride in yourself and the good sense God gives us all to see a sign. 

1. Follow that sign

2. Learn from the sign. 

Stop attempting to validate or blame that lying man for what he said to you.  When you heard it, you knew it was a lie. While you witness his behavior you know it's a lie. You just think you are “different” “special” “a woman he’s never felt this way about before” 

The nail in the coffin happens when you, yourself, not only lied to others, you lied to yourself. You knew everything you were lusting after was a white lie!

In other news, there are those mistresses that feel they are in a great position with a married man that “doesn’t want his wife” The current story line reoccurring in the news is that of a certain reality star that had an ongoing affair with his mistress, mind you: never leaving the wife for years. The mistress always thinks the man will leave their wife for them. When in actuality the man lies, deceives, manipulates and sneaks in every imaginable way to avoid losing his wife. That is until, the WIFE actually gets tired of that man and leaves. 

This situation, on the news currently, incurred a baby and although that broke the camel’s back for the WIFE. An outside child in their marriage caused her to leave the man and finally divorce him.  He didn’t end up with the mistress after all! He’s out here single. He finally was able to be present with his mistress and have an outward and open relationship due to his divorce and it still didn’t even work out.

Now all they have is an innocent child while they’re locked and loaded for the rest of each other’s lives due to temporary burning lust with no viable sustainability!

Mistress Mayhem! 

Happy 34th Birthday!

Today I would’ve called my brother around lunch time. He wouldn’t have been awake any earlier 😌 I would’ve wished him a happy birthday then asked, “what we doing?!” He would’ve sighed and said he didn’t know, and would’ve said, “mama asked me the same thing.” He would’ve told me all about the plans he had for the weekend to celebrate but would’ve then said nonchalantly said, “I guess we could go to dinner.” From there I would’ve said, “duh!” and told him to let me know where and what time. 

Today. 

Today, however I’m grieving the fact that conversation isn’t happening. I’m reluctantly smiling through a day at work as if I really care about what’s coming out of anyone’s mouth. That reluctance isn’t meant but to be mean or nasty BUT it’s reality because none of it matters in the grand scheme of where my mind travels to. 

Today. 

Today, I’m celebrating my baby brother’s 34th birthday. Our family is honoring what we feel he would’ve done…dinner. I’m celebrating his life and the time that passed as I watched him grow. 

Today. 

Today, I’m remembering the conversations we held.  The years, months, days, moments, seconds spent as each of his past 34 years went by. Remembering his kind spirit. 

Today.

Today, I’m glad the sky is clear and my thoughts aren’t and couldn’t be clouded by anything other than acknowledging his birthday.  

Today. 

Today, yet another dose of reality is taken. Another gut punch and sting of heartbreak continues.

Today. Memories last a lifetime. Happy 34th BIRTHDAY Nate Nate🙏🏾 

33: My Nate Nate

33! 33 years ago, on September 21st, 1988, I was getting ready while daddy was (badly and too softly) brushing my hair for school awaiting your arrival. I gained the little baby brother I PRAYED for. I was excited then and just as excited each time we celebrated you throughout your 33 years. As the “big” sister I was protective of you to no end. My blood, the Ying to my Yang, the calm to my storm, my real-life Dennis the Menace from the moment you could crawl entering my room to tear my Barbie and the Rockers doll heads off! I remember like yesterday getting SO annoyed at you for taking the clothes off my dolls and taking their heads and arms apart I took socks to tie your arms behind your back and your legs together. You started trying to get out and call out for help to daddy, who was in the living room, so I placed another sock around your mouth! He came in and asked, “What are y’all doing. Let that boy loose!” When I told him why I did it, he couldn’t help but laugh.

You were my first non-paying babysitting job, and my first reason to fight. I still remember like yesterday when you came walking, just as calmly down Rosalee Street to Lessie B’s house (you called her Man) and told me and Ebony that another little boy wanted to fight you. In true rare- hot headed form, Ebony and I rushed from the front yard to confront the little boy. We knew if someone was threatening to fight you, they were the problem because you were so kind, and too friendly to cause an issue with ANYONE! In fact, Ebony was walking faster than me because even she knew better! 

I remember you loving Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles so much you wore your Halloween costume year-round until you literally could not fit into it.  Then you changed to Batman!  You love comics...DC, Marvel, etc. so much so you would get into full on debates about the accuracy and complexity of superheroes.  We grew up in the era of Fox Kids Club, so you were also all about the Mighty Morphing Power Rangers!  You self-taught yourself Asian cultures and could recite terms, customs, art and cuisine.

As we got older, you became my cool big, little baby brother- remaining nonchalant, kind-hearted, thoughtful, talented, creative, funny and you set standards that were forward thinking. You loved anime, and science and animals and nature and food and culture! You loved to cook and create meals that my Lord, I wouldn’t eat but it gave me joy to see you as the chef in the kitchen! You loved my spaghetti! I remember making a pot of spaghetti in high school on a night our parents were out. Now my plan was to cook dinner for you and our cousin that was staying with us then and have plenty enough so our parents could taste it if it came out good…well; you and Nicholas devoured the spaghetti! Y’all cleaned the pot out like it had been washed and left it on the stove. When I asked what happened to all the spaghetti, you rubbed your belly and said, “what are you talking about Khrysti, shoot, we ate that spaghetti. Aye, it was great!” Then had the nerve to want me to fix it the next day.  If food was left in the fridge, you were definitely eating it.  I remember crying...literally real tears crying because I was so mad you ate something in the fridge I'd had as leftovers.  Funny how I can't remember what the food was now, but I remember Mama making it for me after she knew I was crying behind some food.  

I remember your pet turtle Alphalpha! You adored that turtle, and nobody could tell you to stop putting him in your face. That is until Alphalpha clipped you one right on the lip. You still have the mark from when he took a nip at that top lip. You loved (animals) dogs so much you would find stray puppies and bring them home. At some point we had two dogs and with both of them I would run for my life getting out of the car to get in the house. Your love of dogs trumped my fear.

You here recently gave me the illustrations I asked for about ten years ago for my children’s book! I laugh NOW because you most definitely did things in your way, in YOUR time. You came through for each of your niece and nephew’s parties though. Always right on time. Whatever I needed painted or drawn out; you made it happen. No questions asked.  I was and always will be in awe of the talents you naturally acquired, most, without any formal training. Piano playing, shoe design, graphic artist, rapping, music production, writing, digital art, sculpting, jewelry making, tattoo artist…you name it, and it’s artistic…you could do it! You've even made bows for our Khloé's hair.  Just an OUTSTANDING talent.

We spoke sibling language- our eyes held conversations that only required us to chuckle with each other. I’ll miss your random calls to say, “Khrysti. Oh. What are you doing? …That’s cool. Mama and daddy tripping!” Then you’d give me a day's laugh of what went down at the Cunningham house. Your joy of teaching Khloé and Karson various forms of art will remain with them always. Khloé is already pretending she’s still playing with you. She’s such a little lady! She said, “I’m not sad Nathen died, he’s just resting.” I picked her up from school a few days ago and she was talking out loud.  I could hear her say your name multiple times and change her voice as she continued talking out loud.  I asked, "Khloé, what are you doing?"  She said, "Playing with Nathan.  Well, pretending because he can't talk back, you know? He’s an angel, so he’s here but I can’t see him and he can’t talk back."

You may be gone from our sight but never from our visions. We’ll watch as you brush the sky with your sketches and paintings, we’ll listen as you whistle, hum or make tunes with the wind, we’ll feel your belly laugh as we laugh at all the wonderful memories of you. I pray you sweet sleep baby brother. Take your rest; until we meet again, I’ll hold you in my heart forever. I love you, Nate Nate.

Khrysti 

My Very FIRST Assistant Principal’s Week

Wow!!!! What an amazing year of growing and learning I have had…and it’s NOT over yet!! I overheard a burnt out teacher say, “5 Fridays and 7 Mondays left” LOL 

As a first year AP, my current principal has been THE best motivation and mentor I’ve ever had! About seven years ago I had another principal that PUSHED me to get out of the classroom and expound on the talents and learning I had acquired in a ten year span. 

I work along side one of the most efficient and professional assistant principals I’ve encountered and he has helped to guide me daily through this journey! To say the least; my first year has been cultivated with support and for that; I thank God everyday along my drive to work. Thankful I wasn’t thrown into the fire without protection or support!

The journey hasn’t been easy, BUT, I can tell you I’m grateful for the experience…the experiences I WOULD change and those I wouldn’t! 

*Gifts provided by Caytlyn Stanley with Hospitality Health Er, Dr. Burchfield, and Mrs. Towels!

Leadership Styles

Around sometime last year a group of leaders and I brought up leadership style. We were asked how we viewed ourselves and leaders and what leadership meant to us. Ever since acquiring my master’s the first charge was recognizing my methodology and philosophy on leadership.

After vivid models from the professors teaching us, not to mention; the on the job training we learned through internship I recognized early on I identified most to Servant Leadership. Interestingly enough, during the meeting last year with the group I, again, identified myself as a servant leader. When I tell you it was one of the most taxing discussions I’ve ever had to have explaining what a servant leader meant and was. 

I would say they were jiving me by pretending not to understand servant leadership but I don’t think the group was that cohesive to come up with the elaborate scheme to trick me. 

I say all that to say; I’m glad to have come across this simplistic chart on leadership styles.